Finding The Way

 

Do you ever feel as if you are alone? That if you were to disappear, no one would notice or care? Do you ever find yourself in a room, sitting alone, while others seem to be the life of the party? They are the one everyone gathers around, while you feel left out? Do you find yourself deliberately standing back in a gathering, feeling alone while others are gathered together laughing and enjoying the moment? Because you feel as if you don't fit in, don't belong, don't ... don't....don't??

Where do we get these ideas, thoughts and feelings from?

Yes, we are each and all different from the others. Every one of us is unique with out own set of talents and personality. Some are more comfortable in group gatherings, while some may be better at hiding or working over and through their discomfort. Some may be better and more determined to be a part of something rather than allow insecurities to cause them to miss out. Some love the fun and energy that comes from being in a crowd.

There is a sad truth that thanks to things such as internet and social media giving some people a sense of anonymity, they feel as if they can- and they do- attack people at will. Laughing at the differences we each hold. The thing is, this simply shows their own immaturity and lack of human compassion and kindness. It is not a showing of the one being attacked shortcomings. If you are one who is being harassed or attacked, understand that one truth. It still hurts, but we can learn that it isn't us so much as it is them.

Can we take the attacks and grow from them? If we are in need of further education, lessons on clothing and style, manners, weight, hygiene, learning what talents we possess and which ones we don't.. or how to be able to dance (even if we have no talent) as if no one is watching. We can, we can take what someone means for pain, and make it a stairway to improvement and really turn the tables on the attacker. Because the sad truth to a lot of the attacks is that the attacker is not as secure as they want others to believe and they attack to make themselves feel better by making others feel less.

Now, we are each and every one of us important in our own rights and ways. We each and everyone contribute to this life through our own personalities and talents. We are different by design. A tree is designed to be tall and create shade, every plant cannot be a tree, we need the shrubbery to provide food and shade for the smaller animals and the flowers for the insects. Not every person can be singers, because then who would dance? Not every person can be writers, because who would act? Not every person can be leaders, or designers....

We are each and every single one of us important in our own selves. We are created to be that way. Do not let another individual, because they do not understand this- make you feel less than who you are. Do not allow your own insecurities cause you to miss out on life and laughter. Find your strength, find your voice, find your talent..because we all do have them. With our voice and talents we can BE and create a difference in this life- for ourselves and for those around us who are struggling.

Even if you are uncomfortable in group settings, you matter. Even when you feel as if you do not fit into the group energy, you do as you are a part of that energy. Find at least one individual and focus on them, (not in a creep way) and allow that to block the discomfort. Seek and be part of the conversations with them and those around you. Find even a small piece of common ground and use that. Do not, let you discomfort in a situation cause you to leave there and trash talk the event and people. That will not earn you any points in your favor. There may be those who see, read, hear your vitriolic words and even share them, but would not seek to be around you for fear of you turning on them as well.

Understand that groups of people are made up of people with different personalities and energy levels. One must learn how to react to the differences and find your comfort with them. But, to also understand that it may not always work. It does take two to make a friendship work. Sometimes, personalities do not match but that doesn't make you or them bad, just too different. It will work with others, you simply have to brave up and keep trying. Either way know, if you disappeared, you would be missed. Even when you feel unimportant, you are very much important. What we often do not see, is that the smallest acts, can and will make the biggest difference for some. Find a way to allow your inner strength and courage to grow and guide you. Keep being the you who you are and know that others do appreciate you and look for you, even when you do not realize or see.