Excitment in the Air-

Just a little over an hour ago my son and I got home from several errands. One was taking care of his financial aid forms for college. The other- was for me-sorta. It was actually for my books.
I self-published both of my books: Blessed- a collection of inspirational poetry and The Legend of Dragon's Doom: a young warrior's vow- a young adult fantasy novel. I chose to do this for several reasons. Blessed because it is poetry and poetry is very difficult to find a traditional publisher interested in poetry. The Legend of Dragon's Doom because in all honesty I got a bit paranoid over it. I had published a little over half of it in an open blog. I never thought this book was turn out as it did. It was originally meant to be a short poem for a writing prompt. It simply took on a life of its own and became the novel that it is.
I did not simply write the books, create the file and upload these books without forethought. They were proofed for me by many people of various backgrounds. This was and is my dream and I was not about to mess it up by being lazy and careless.
Still, self-published books have a bad reputation and I had to fight that.
I was told time and again that it is nearly impossible to get a self-published book into a brick and mortar store. But, that was my dream, to see my books on the shelves of a store.
I send articles to a local weekly magazine. A couple of weeks ago I was reading this magazine and saw an article about a new book boutique and coffee bar opening up and I decided to take a chance. I fired off an email asking if they would be interested in carrying my books and a possible book signing. I honestly did not expect a response any time soon. I had one waiting the next morning. My husband who works out of town a lot was in that weekend so I replied telling them I would be up there the following weekend.
When I arrived she was incredibly friendly and just plain nice. She liked the books and kept a copy of each. She talked about her grand opening and the possibility of a book signing maybe around Easter. She asked if I had anything I would like to contribute for her giveaway goodie bags- I told her I did and would get them to her as quickly as I could. That was today.
I had handmade bookmarks and fridge magnets and some bags I had decorated for my books that were leftover from the craft shows. She kept a couple more of the books and told me she would get in touch with me when they sold. I still plan on going by there for the Grand Opening- there's going to be live music- who can pass that up? And the chance to see my books on the shelves of an honest to goodness brick and mortar store-

where is the laughter?

Its sad at how we tend to look at things differently as adults. We lose an innocence, a sense of fun. Its obvious of course, that this happens. That does not change my opinion. There should be a way, that even as adults, understanding the responsibility of being an adult, that we should still have the feeling of wonder, that we held as children.
Maybe the scientists among us still hold a portion of that. It could be that those who go out looking for new or old species in lands that are not so well traveled, still hold a portion. Astronauts, going out into space. Among us, there may be the few that remember. Most of us I fear, have forgotten.
The day to day to day lives that we must live, pull it from us. It drains the adventure, the hope, the fun....the innocence and wonder that we once knew. The feeling that drew us from the every day and boring to the imaginative and fun. It drew us to watch a bird or a butterfly in flight. It drew us to watch an earth worm or snake move across the ground. We chased shadows and we chased lightening bugs.
Our days were filled with laughter, as children.

Where is that now? As adults, carrying the responsibility of jobs and family..where is the laughter we once knew?

Living here we do not often get snow. This for us--as for most of the nation- has been a winter that has brought more snow than we have seen in years. While the adult in me, hates with a passion to attempt to drive in it, and if at all possible--won't. It brings out the kid in me in a hurry. As soon as I can I have camera in hand and am out in the woods. I am following creeks and hills and critters. I forget that I am supposed to be cold, I forget just how badly I hate the cold and I run. I fall and I climb and I photograph. This last snow I took one hundred and fifty photographs. Most of all, as I walked counting animal tracks, I smiled and I laughed and I forgot all about being a responsible adult.
My son and I had snow cream. I don't usually try and make it as it has never been a favorite of mine. I made it this time because the kid in me, that had escaped from capitivity for a time, wanted it.
The snow melted quickly. It is still here and there in patches. My photos are already uploaded into the computer, they will last long after the last of the snow is gone. But the memories of the walk, the memories of playing happily where no one could see and tsk tsk my actions, that I will carry in my heart forever.
I am blessed, and I know it.

On Friday Oct. 30Th I decided to begin raking the leaves in my yard. We only have eleven big oaks in the yard and many more surrounding it. With my son Jame's help we managed to get a little over half of the yard cleaned. By Friday evening I was sick. Medicine and early bed time didn't help a lot. By Saturday evening I was only slightly better. I spent the next week doing the best I could to doctor myself and work my way through what I thought to be a serious allergy attack. By Thursday I was unable to breath and having serious chest pains. I was able to work for a couple of hours before I gave up. I was able to get in to see the doctor and was told that it was nothing serious, nothing contagious but I would suffer from it for a while. I was also given several medications to attempt to help me as I made my way through this creeping crud. This worried me as I have done some almost nonstop coughing and I had a table at the local Lions Club Bazaar to attempt to sell my books.
Today was that day. I woke feeling very weak, very tired, and very sick to my stomach. I got up early, scrambled an egg and attempted to get something on my stomach. Determined that I was not going to let this illness stop me-- and since my dad had wanted me to do this bad enough to pay for it- I woke my son to help me load the car and we went to the school where the bazaar was being held.
My table was immediately inside the door. It didn't take us very long to have everything inside and set up. James stayed long enough to make sure I was set and then he left and returned home and as I found out later, back to bed. After I was set up I was able to talk to the lady set up next to me. Her and her husband are friends of my dad and I can see why, they were an incredibly nice couple of people.
As the day wore on I was able to talk with several of the other vendors. There were bakers, painters and weavers. They were wives, sisters, brothers and husbands. They were an incredibly talented and friendly group. Each offered advice on how they created, how they promoted and how they networked.
I had a great day, I made friends, I sold a few books. There is the chance that someone who knows someone can help me with The Legend of Dragon's Doom: a young warrior's vow and getting it more -out there- This person was very upset when I self published it, even when I explained that I felt that too much of it had been posted openly on a blog. So today I gave her a copy to do what she felt she could do with it to see if that would get it more mainstream. I have no idea how long it will take, I hope not too long as my husband is growing impatient with all the boxes of books sitting here unsold..
I've really done pretty well with the poetry book- Blessed. I'm glad actually- even as I want The Legend to do well- Blessed- is a large part of me and my heart. I love doing a google search and seeing where all it is turning up. I still plan on finding something I can use to mark places on a world map.
There are some speed bumps that are showing up along the way in this journey, but they too are just another lesson that I need to learn. I feel that anything learned too easily may not fully be learned and is too easily forgotten. Something that you have to work for, stays with you much longer.
And my books- are well worth taking the time and struggles to learn the lessons to promote them, sell them, and even maybe, possibly, could be..a little main stream chance in their future-never-- ever-- say never.

wonder of it all

There is an old saying that you can never go home again..it is incorrect. You may go home changed, wounded, matured, but you can go home again. It is up to you how you handle life and what you find there.

I moved away from here once. Stayed away for nearly two years. Then wounded and weary I returned. It took a while, but healing - true healing- is a slow process. Now I can walk this place and see it for what it is- my blessing.

When some people think of dirt roads there is a negative connotations with it. Part of that I can understand, especially when you are trying to drive through red mud after a summer storm rain storm or winter snow. Otherwise I find dirt roads to be peaceful and for the most part quiet. Especially mine. Narrow and coming to a dead end in the woods there is not much traffic compared to main roads. I can watch squirrel and rabbit dart across the road in front of me without fear. I have walked up on many deer and the occasional raccoon. I have walked out into the open area along my route and watched Hawk and Turkey Buzzard alike scan the grounds for their next meal. I have carried my camera and captured photos not only of the mammals and birds, but of many spiders, bees and various insects that find their meals among the various wildflowers that bloom along the way.

My wounds have healed. I have faced other storms. As time has passed, this place has proven time and again- you can indeed go home again.

dreams to reality

I have long dreamed of being an author. I have been a writer for as long as I can recall. It is my belief that if you write anything at all, poetry, short stories, novels, fan fiction; you are a writer. It is when you see that writing published, when you take that next step, holding book in hand, you then become an author. It is a dream I had thought would remain just that, a dream.
For years I sent columns to a local paper. They gladly accepted my offerings. Publishing them on a semi-regular and then for a while regular basis. That came to a sudden halt not too long ago. Whether they had lost interest in what I offered or had grown tired of my tales, or if the economy (which has wounded us all in some way) had something to do with it. It could also be that I had lost my enthusiasm for it as I was finally pursuing my dream.
It was almost a year ago now that I innocently wandered over to a writer's prompt web page and saw the photos of castles and dragons and other various medieval suggestions. I thought I could jot down a quick poem, post it and be done with it. Instead this poem kept growing. Going from one to six parts and then beginning to change. Taking a life of its own it turned into a story. This story grew into the novel that it is now, The Legend of Dragon's Doom: a Young Warrior's Vow.
Before that I had been writing inspirational poetry. Each day I try to post a poem of praise and thanks, poetry that seeks and finds. Those were collected together into a book titled Blessed. Most of these were written during the time when I was battling cancer and my husband was out of work. During the time of dark storms and bright inspirational light and hope.
I self published both of these. Blessed, because it is poetry. The Legend of Dragon's Doom because most of it was published openly in one of my blogs online. I did not think it would go as far as it did, or garner the attention and comments that it did. By the time I realized what I had, it was too late. With first rights basically gone I saw no reason to approach the traditional publishers or agents. I did however have these books proof read by no less than six people. I suffered over every word, every sentence. These books are a part of me. While I did not have to deal with letters of rejection, that does not mean I cared less, tried less, put less into them.
With books in hand I have set out to turn this project into the grand adventure that it could possibly be. Creating business cards and other hand outs that I carry with me at all times, right nest to copies of each book. I try to take advantage of every opportunity to talk about my books. I have participated in local festivals in an attempt to sell books and also to get my name out there so that people know the books exist.
I have contacted people that I hope will be able to assist me. One being the event coordinator at the local library. Being that they have always been good about supporting and promoting local artists and authors I hope that it will continue with me.
I have other projects that are in the works. One being a collection of short stories about life here on my dirt road. There is a magic here, and I believe that magic played a part in the creation of these books and the ones to come.
I believe that during the time of storm that I faced, during the many walks I took then and the ones I take now, I am never alone. I am blessed in my belief, I am blessed in many ways- therefore the titles- Blessed.
May we all
find out blessing.