Friday, November 19, 2010

the pain that flows within

  I was reading an article on bullies- it seems that there are more and more of those showing up. And yet, the people that need to be seeing these, are not taking them to heart. They do not seem to sense the importance of what is going on nor the importance of finding a solution. Is there one? I honestly don't know. I know that this is something that has gone on for ages past and will most probably continue unabated.
  I imagine that one that has never been the victim of a bully does not understand, can not ever fully comprehend the pain that comes from such torture. We all understand that a bully is one that torments their victims with verbal, emotional, mental and physical abuse. That old saying "Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me" is not true. Bruises heal. Broken bones heal. The memory stays around from what ever caused them, the memory of the pain associated with the injury remains, but the physical wounds heal.
  Verbal assaults strike the heart and soul of the victim and become lodged there. The victim feels these words, hears these words haunting them, echoing in their minds. The words continuous taunting causes the victim to become even more the victim because they begin to believe them. Maybe, just maybe they are stupid and ugly and unworthy and and and...
  And the adults and authority and whom ever is in charge if they dare report it passes it off as some childhood ritual that must be passed through. It is something that happens, something that will blow over, something that just isn't important and worthy of interference. Fear may drive them, what if they intervene and a parent of the bully gets angry and swears the claims are not true and their little darling has been falsely accused and that they will go to the school board or what ever organization is involved and make things right. Never able to consider that their little darling could be so cruel as to be a bully.
  Fear of make the wrong parent angry the powers may turn the tables on the victim and make them doubly the victim by punishing them in some form. What would make me say this? I've seen it in action, I know it to happen.
 So, the victim suffers, at the hands of the bully and at the hands of those that should protect them. A person being bullied may see a peer go for help only to go through the above. Only to be ignored, or blamed or told to 'get over it' so why report it? Why be doubled assaulted? So they suffer in silence. Their heart grows weak as does their spirit. Fearing that no one understands.
 Why can we not stop this?
  We are all different. We are blond or brunette or redhead. WE are tall, short skinny or not. We are American, Englishman, German or Middle Eastern. We are different. We are medical workers, manufacturers, office workers, truck drivers. We are different from the beginning and we remain different as we progress.
 Why, must there be people- children and adults- that think it is fine to ridicule others? What sense of power does one get by causing another such pain? Are the laughs garnered at another's expense really worth it?
I wrote the following this morning..because I was a victim, I know victims of bullies and I know how the victims are treated..

You didn't know

even as I told you, it was something

you couldn't understand

just how bad it was

even if, you had seen

dealt with similar issues

once upon a time

you passed them off now

it wasn't so bad

it wasn't real

my brother was treated worse

maybe, kinda, maybe

You didn't know, could not comprehend

the pain

that flowed within me

strangling me

the pain I suffered

at the hands and at the taunts

of my tormentors

You didn't know

could not realize how I suffered

in silence

once I realized, you wouldn't speak

other than to tell me things

so wrong

so wrong

so wrong

did you really think that would work?

and I suffered

enduring the pain

inflicted by peers

words meant to hurt

words meant to insult

actions meant to demoralize

create fear

You didn't know

others didn't care

turn away

turn away

turn away

it isn't happening

this pain

that never goes away

and they dare at some point

if you dare to recall aloud

to blame you

you took it wrong

it was a joke

only a joke

you have no sense of humor

you took it wrong

and I turn away

walk away

carrying with me still

the pain

you couldn't understand

wouldn't understand

this pain that flows within

Blessed, a collection of God given inspirational poetry by Rebecca Stepp Revels is available now @

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Blessed in His Promises

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